STILL GOING STRONG!

I know you think this is going to sound corny, but I really think I am finding myself in here. Oh boy, it sounds like I am writing from my prison cell. Though sometimes it really feels like prison because I do not have a lot of freedom, and the food is terrible, its not really that bad. I do however, have endless time on my hands. It is so funny how in just 11 days I feel like a somewhat new person. I feel strong and empowered because I know I am doing what any mom would do to keep her baby healthy.

Oh...hold on...

"For the 50th time today, WILL YOU PLEASE SHUT THE DOOR BEHIND YOU or I will whip this magazine right at your..."

Okay, where was I? Oh yeh, I am so incredibly strong and patience is really the key! LOL!!! Jeff and I had a great date night last night. He brought me my favorite sub, a chicken finger sub and onion rings. He is so thoughtful, he even remembered the ketchup this time. He did however take the laptop home with him. He needed to bring much more than a chicken finger sub to make that okay in my book. But, my wonderful mother-in-law brought it right back to me today. What a nice surprise. Before Jeff left last night he did manage to snap a new belly shot of me on a quick trip to the bathroom. So check it out! No make-up though. Maybe I can convince Jeff to bring that next week when he takes the laptop.

I have had wonderful visits from friends and family. The weekdays are the most boring because people are at work. Luckily I have a friend that works here, and she bee bops in and says Hi, and my wonderful Mom calls and keeps me calm and happy throughout the day. Today Tucker and Jeff are coming up to see me, and I have new things that people have sent me to give to Tucker. Stickers and cookies work well! Hint Hint Hint!

Tomorrow I will be 26 weeks along. Keep praying and believing. We sure are!

HOW I ENDED UP HERE...

Jeff, Tucker, and I went on our annual July 4th trip down to VA for a fun filled week at the "rivah". I just wasn't feeling up to par and was very tired. I just chalked it up to a long trip with my husband and 3 year old. Until one day it hit me. Right on back of the jet ski in the middle of the Rappahanock River, Jeff and I went over a wave and I felt it. Don't ask me what I felt, but I leaned over and said "Honey, I think I am pregnant!" Well, its a good thing I was holding on, otherwise I was going to land in the water, because Jeff just stopped on a dime. After our quick conversation and conclusion that I was crazy, we went on about our outing and forgot about it. Or so I thought. As it turns out, Jeff had been thinking about it for the rest of the week, and immediately upon our return to Buffalo, he asked me to take a test. So, before the car was even unpacked, we knew we were going to have another baby. He decided that I had better take another one, so after 3 more tests, we were sure.

Baby Boy Morris just 2 months old!

Oh, how scared we were. Here we were getting ready for the 1 year anniversary of our twins birth and death, and finding out we were going to be parents again. I called the Dr. that week and went in 2 weeks later for a confirmation test, and of course, it was positive. We then worked out a plan for our extreme high risk pregnancy. I was to have weekly sonograms to check my cervical length, and I was going to start progesterone injections once a week to help keep me from going into preterm labor. My pregnancy was going great, yes I was tired, but no, I was not as sick this time like I was in the past. I felt amazing. And check out the belly, I was getting huge!!!

Weeks went by and no change in my cervical length and Jeff is a wonderful man, who has become a professional progesterone giver. He was not squimish at all about having to inject me with a needle. Tucker would frequently go with me to my sonogram appointments and he quickly became the mascot of the Ultrasound Dept. I was in deep trouble if I didn't bring their "Little Man" with me.

That brings us to my birthday. My birthday was wonderful! It consisted of my husband's whole family, and my favorite dinner...pizza and wings. I got great presents and enjoyed the whole night. The next day which was Friday the 16th. At around 1:15pm I was laying on the couch watching TV and relaxing until Tucker got home from school. All of a sudden I started having contractions. I did what I knew to do. I drank some water, used the restroom, and laid on my side. And repeated it when after 20 minutes I was still having them. Well, at 2:00 after calling the Dr., I called Jeff to come home to get Tucker off of the bus, because the Dr. had instructed me to go to Labor and Delivery. I thought "Here we go again". Jeff found someone else to get Tucker and he drove me to the hospital.

When we got to the hospital it was an emotional rollercoaster and we were overwhelmed with questions about previous pregnancies, and what exactly had I been doing when the contractions started. By this point the contractions had gone from every 7 minutes to every 2 minutes. I was flipping out. Well, after many tests, monitors, medicines, and doctors, it was decided that I was going to stay for awhile. My contractions finally stopped at 10:00am on Sunday morning. Not soon enough. I ended up dilating to 1cm from the contractions. The neonatologist came by to discuss the complications that a 24 week baby would encounter and what we needed to expect. We were scared, but we had faith.

Well, that was 9 days ago!!! And I'm still pregnant!!! The baby and I are doing fantastic and are under the best care possible. I have been ordered on hospital bedrest until I deliver or 34 weeks, whichever comes first. I have a private room, and Jeff has completely set it up for me. I obviously have the internet. My iPod and Nintendo DS have really come in handy too. Jeff also keeps me stocked with DVDs, clean clothes, and wonderful company. I really do have the best husband in the world. He has taken over the household. And has done a great job with Tucker and bringing him up here to see me.

I will post more tomorrow on how we are, and maybe a picture of my room, so you can visualize my new home. Please continue to pray for us. And thank you all for your love and support.

PARKER & GRACE MORRIS...MOMMY'S LITTLE ANGELS

On May 10, 2006, Jeff and I went to the hospital for a routine sonogram. We were so excited to find out what we were having. I was only 12 weeks pregnant, so we knew that we wouldn't get a definate answer, but even the chance to see our baby was wonderful. The sonogram tech placed the probe on my stomach and immediatly removed it and asked if this was our first sonogram. Of course it was, but we asked her why. She got a smile on her face and told us that there were two babies in there. Jeff and I couldn't believe it, our wildest dreams had come true. (Well mine anyway, I always wanted twins) We were told that they were fraternal, and that we possibly had 1 boy and 1 girl. Could life have gotten any better?








After preterm delivery with Tucker, having twins was less than ideal according to my doctor. With a backround like mine and me already being high risk for preterm labor, this was now a high priority pregnancy. Things progressed as normal pregnancies should. I have never been sicker, never so tired, and my stomach had never been bigger. I was sent for monthly sonograms to make sure the babies were growing well. This is when things took a turn for the worse. At my 19 week sonogram, the technologist saw funneling in my cervix. Which means, my body was preparing for birth. The perinatologist agreed and my doctor was called immediately. I was now on bedrest and scheduled for a cerclage (the stitch) 2 days later. I got my cerclage, with no problem, and put on bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy, and I was to return in 1week for a post-op check. I waited in the waiting room wondering if I was ever going to be called back to be checked. It felt like an eternity. Finally, it was my turn. The doctor came in, and examined the stitch. I will never forget his words "Everything looks good...oh, except!" My cervix was still funneling, as a matter of fact, it funnelled to the stitch and was tearing my cervix. I was sent to labor and delivery so he could remove the stitch, and the fate of my babies was in God's hands. The stitch was removed and I was now put in the hospital on total bedrest, and in trendelenberg position (on my head). I would've stayed in that position until the end of time to save my angels. But that was not in God's plan.



On my 7th day in the hospital, I was having contractions here and there, no one thought anything of it. Until 4:00pm they hooked me up to the monitor because I was so uncomfortable. A resident Dr. came to examine me. I was 5cm dilated and my amniotic sac bulging. All she could say was "I am so sorry". I was rolled very quickly to L&D to deliver. My water was broken and at 10:43pm my angels were brought into this world with my husband by my side. Parker and Grace were born together, holding one another. It was beautiful. Parker held on until 11:04pm and Grace until 11:59pm. My husband and I got to hold them until they passed. I somehow knew when I was holding them, the moment they past. A feeling swept through me and I knew when they were gone. My mom, and Jeff's parents were able to come in and witness, their grandchildren be baptised. I am truelly blessed to have spent that time with our angels, as not everyone is able too. They will live on in our hearts forever and will forever be missed.

Grace Lee Morris

Parker Bryant Morris

Please also visit Parker and Grace's website :

http://parkerandgracemorris.memory-of.com/About.aspx?c=1

IN THE BEGINNING...A HISTORY

My name is Courtney. And I am starting this blog from a hospital bed trying not to go back into premature labor. I am 25 weeks pregnant with my son, and I am going to stay in bed to help him continue to grow. I have chosen to blog to keep everyone posted and as a way to sort of journal my feelings. So I guess I will start from the very beginning...

I am married to a wonderful man named Jeff. We met in NC in 1999 on vacation. We fell in love and married in 2003.

A few short months later, Jeff and I found out that we were going to be parents for the first time. My first pregnancy was fairly uneventful in the beginning. Then everything changed, at 27 weeks my water began to leak. I was diagnosed with PPROM which is the rupturing of your amniotic sac too early. I spent 7 days in our Women's and Children's Hospital on bedrest to prevent me from going into labor. By the 7th day, I had developed an infection and our son had to be delivered. The doctors induced me, and within 18 hours on March 25, 2004 Tucker Charles Morris was born into this world at just 2lbs 15oz. After being on a breathing machine for a week and a machine they call CPAP for a few more weeks, we were able to hold Tucker and feed him with a bottle.

On May 5, 2004 we were able to bring our baby home. He was so tiny, he barely fit in his car seat. We were so nervous to bring him home with his oxygen and heart monitor. We thought that we weren't going to be able to handle it. But as the days went on, we were pros. With feeding every 45 minutes, my wonderful husband took shifts with me, so that we could sleep.

Tucker has grown over the years into a beautiful child. Not that I am biased...

Needless to say, Tucker is now 3 1/2 years old, and rules our world. Tucker is a very special child. He is hearing impaired and wears hearing aids in both ears. He recently started school participating in an Oral Def Program, which teaches children to speak with their mouths, not just their hands. He was so precious heading off to school the first day. He has grown up way too fast.